Saturday, September 4, 2010

The Dejected Walk Alone-Written in February 2008

The Dejected Walk Alone

Sick of the looks, angry words and stares

A world full of doubt, distate and smite

It's nothing but the best for you isn't it

It has to be one way or no way

The world calls its minions to the surface

Angry claws ripping, pulling, scarring my heart

Words fail to express, tears fall down and emotions sink

Why can't we let it die, and reduce this strife that fills our lives

Love has lost its hold, it exists no longer

Nothing but anger, a simmering pot of attitude

Everyone ones at fault how do you solve this

No one changes, no one insists that things be different

Gone is the world of communication and compromise

Hello to world full of unfair actions and hurtful words

Instead of helping each other we choose to take it out on others

Why can't it be different, why can't it be the way its supposed to be

Why does it have to be this way

I'm sure that several only see one side of this convoluted story

Feel free to make your judgements and choose your sides

The truth is, I've picked myself up before when nothing went the right way

I'll do it again. I don't need you to believe me or understand

Only I will ever know the non existent harmony that is my home.


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Our Journey towards Making a Family

Long Version : Our Journey Blog Post
Go here to learn about how we got our start..and where we are now!

Short Version:
11-28-2008- Started Dating

2-14-2010- Got Engaged :)

4-3-2010- First Positive Test- Baby 1 due 12/10/10

5-1-2010- Miscarriage at 8wks2days

12-10-2010- Estimated Due Date for Baby 1

5-5-2011- Second Positive Test- Baby 2 due 1-12-12
5-7-2011- We are Married!! :)
5-14-2011- Miscarriage at 5wks2days

6-16-2011- Repeated Pregnancy Loss blood work
6-23-2011- HSG looks good!
6-23-2011- dx positive ANA- Anti Nuclear Antibodies

07-05-2011- Rheumatologist Appointment
7-11-2011- dx Low Vitamin D levels. Start Prescription Vitamin D and baby aspirin

09/2011- Officially No Longer Preventing

10/5/11-First cycle Actively Trying. AF shows up

11/21/11-Celiac Bloodwork Negative, Vit D still lower than normal, start another prescription. Continue prenatals with Vit. D as well

01-12-12-Estimated Due Date for Baby 2
01/12-Vit D in normal range, start over the counter Daily Calcium with Vit D supplement per Rhuematologist.

2/15/12-Appt with new Ob who is more proactive with Progesterone Testing-suspects progesterone issues.

2/15/12- 5/9/12-Stop trying and start new charting method (Creighton) to watch for hormone imbalance.