Sunday, June 26, 2011

Music to Remind Me to Breath....

I am coming out of lurkdom for a few seconds because I've had quite a few things happen to me, that kind of woke me up a bit...

I'm feeling a lot better. My husband and I talked about the fact that we definitely believed in God and we are still praying..and a good friend helped me remember that it was okay to be angry at him and that he could take it. If you are reading this, Thank You. I do plan to call you sometime soon, I've just been distracted. Then when I remember it's too late.

I've always had a huge connection to music. You could preach at me for an hour and a half and it won't register and then you sing one worship song and it will touch my soul and have me crying.  I spent a long time in prayer last night. I was angry at God and told him so. I told him I wanted a specific sign that I, my relationship, EVERYTHING was going to be okay.

We got in the car and opened the mail to a beautiful, thoughtful card from a dear friend....with a butterfly on the front. The well thought, heartfelt message made me cry and the fact that she took the time to send a card and check on us..I can't even tell you. I didn't even tell her what was going on with us...she saw it on here. I love that she reached out to us in that way. It meant the world.

Then, as we were driving back home from running a few errands we passed an old abandoned store front. This store front is in the middle of our town. We drive past it constantly! But today I happened to look over at the storefront. There, in the window, was a sign. It just said,

It Can Get Better.

Wow. Okay, yeah I'm listening. I don't know what God has in store for us, but I have to believe there is purpose in all of this and that he is holding us in his arms.  Later tonight I stumbled across a blog with some just resonated with me. It brought me back to that sign. I don't know what his plan is...but from here on out I need to remember, It can get better!  I will leave you with some youtube songs that I've needed lately.

1 comment:

  1. Oh Linds....
    I'm crying for you as I read this. They are tears of pure joy.
    I, too, asked for a sign yesterday, and I got hit over the head.
    I'm so happy for you, because I know that you will find comfort in a way that noone on Earth can give it to you.
    I wish we were closer. We could go grab a coffee. I can't promise mine would be decaf though


Our Journey towards Making a Family

Long Version : Our Journey Blog Post
Go here to learn about how we got our start..and where we are now!

Short Version:
11-28-2008- Started Dating

2-14-2010- Got Engaged :)

4-3-2010- First Positive Test- Baby 1 due 12/10/10

5-1-2010- Miscarriage at 8wks2days

12-10-2010- Estimated Due Date for Baby 1

5-5-2011- Second Positive Test- Baby 2 due 1-12-12
5-7-2011- We are Married!! :)
5-14-2011- Miscarriage at 5wks2days

6-16-2011- Repeated Pregnancy Loss blood work
6-23-2011- HSG looks good!
6-23-2011- dx positive ANA- Anti Nuclear Antibodies

07-05-2011- Rheumatologist Appointment
7-11-2011- dx Low Vitamin D levels. Start Prescription Vitamin D and baby aspirin

09/2011- Officially No Longer Preventing

10/5/11-First cycle Actively Trying. AF shows up

11/21/11-Celiac Bloodwork Negative, Vit D still lower than normal, start another prescription. Continue prenatals with Vit. D as well

01-12-12-Estimated Due Date for Baby 2
01/12-Vit D in normal range, start over the counter Daily Calcium with Vit D supplement per Rhuematologist.

2/15/12-Appt with new Ob who is more proactive with Progesterone Testing-suspects progesterone issues.

2/15/12- 5/9/12-Stop trying and start new charting method (Creighton) to watch for hormone imbalance.