Sunday, September 25, 2011

TMI....maybe. But this is my blog so..

First of all, I'm so sorry that I've been absent from the blogging world for so long!!!

I've been insanely busy lately between going back to work and the craziness that is my classroom (LONG STORY), and then helping my best friend get married to Nick's best friend. They are an AMAZING couple and I'm so very happy for them. :)

It must be the time for our generation to be getting married because we sure are going to be busy attending weddings in the next few months!! I just attended a bridal shower for an amazing friend of mine yesterday actually!!

Now, onto why I started this post in the first place...and it may be TMI for some, so if you're not interested...stop reading now. lol

After what seems like forever, we are now FINALLY trying to conceive again! I am so hopeful, nervous, excited...its a bunch of feelings all pushed together. I know that if it doesn't happen this month, it will be okay, but I'm strangely confident.

I hate this part though...the two week wait as they call it. Where you sit and you wait, and you wait...and you WAIT.

Ugh. Of course, my brain is analyzing every twinge! I just want it to be testing day already!

I'm scared obviously, after two miscarriages, its hard not to be. But Nick is an amazing man, and my ROCK. I am so very thankful for him. He's scared too though. He worries we may never be able to have kids, because of all the issues. That straight up breaks my heart. I want NOTHING more to make him a father...because I know he will be amazing at it! I already told him that if my issues continue we can look into getting more testing done if necessary or meds....and then a surrogate. Because then, even though I sadly wouldn't get to experience the getting pregnant part, at least it would be a baby made of Nick and I, just carried by someone else.

Of course, there are worries with that too. Who would we choose. Would they miscarry too due to a possible genetic issue between nick and I? The EXPENSE?!?! 

Adoption is always an option as well, but that is sort of our last resort. Its an amazing thing to do but I just want to exhaust all options of biological children first before researching that step :)

I know though that I will do ANYTHING within my power, to get us a baby. I'm just hoping and praying that God grants us the ability to conceive a healthy baby at some point. We're ready.  The next two weeks will be hard and anxious and I may use this venue to vent about it, so I'm sorry in advance if I get a little personal lol

And even though I know it might be hard for some....ahem, MOM ;) .....don't ask me every day if we know yet or if we tested. If by the grace of God the test does come back positive we will be waiting to announce for at least awhile, given the past.  Trust me though, that if for once, things come back good, i will be posting on here at some point!

As always, your thoughts, prayers, and encouragements are always very welcome!


  1. congratulations on trying again. i know how tough it is. waiting seriously is the hardest part sometimes. the not knowing. the constant uncertainty.
    you and your husband make such a strong beautiful couple. i wish you nothing but the best and hope that this is the month! i've been thinking about you and checking your blog for updates.
    lots of love and luck!!
    ps-how cool, your best friend marrying your husband's...what a true blessing!!
    thinking about you!

  2. YAY!! I'm happy your trying again to and like you said it would be great if we could be pregnant together. Just relax it will happen. You will be an amazing mom just give it sometime I know easier said than done trust me. Praying for you as always:)

  3. Told you I'd surrogate from the get-go when all this happened. And you know you wouldn't have to pay me a thing. You'd only have to get the procedures done on you and Nick, and of course the legal fees. That's it.

  4. Thanks everyone! I love you all :)


Our Journey towards Making a Family

Long Version : Our Journey Blog Post
Go here to learn about how we got our start..and where we are now!

Short Version:
11-28-2008- Started Dating

2-14-2010- Got Engaged :)

4-3-2010- First Positive Test- Baby 1 due 12/10/10

5-1-2010- Miscarriage at 8wks2days

12-10-2010- Estimated Due Date for Baby 1

5-5-2011- Second Positive Test- Baby 2 due 1-12-12
5-7-2011- We are Married!! :)
5-14-2011- Miscarriage at 5wks2days

6-16-2011- Repeated Pregnancy Loss blood work
6-23-2011- HSG looks good!
6-23-2011- dx positive ANA- Anti Nuclear Antibodies

07-05-2011- Rheumatologist Appointment
7-11-2011- dx Low Vitamin D levels. Start Prescription Vitamin D and baby aspirin

09/2011- Officially No Longer Preventing

10/5/11-First cycle Actively Trying. AF shows up

11/21/11-Celiac Bloodwork Negative, Vit D still lower than normal, start another prescription. Continue prenatals with Vit. D as well

01-12-12-Estimated Due Date for Baby 2
01/12-Vit D in normal range, start over the counter Daily Calcium with Vit D supplement per Rhuematologist.

2/15/12-Appt with new Ob who is more proactive with Progesterone Testing-suspects progesterone issues.

2/15/12- 5/9/12-Stop trying and start new charting method (Creighton) to watch for hormone imbalance.