A week away...

If you don't want to read negativity or sadness...then don't read this post.
I'm sorry but this is my blog, and I'll write what I want.
It is my place to heal, to recover, and to vent out my frustration.

I am a week away from the day I was due to bring a baby into this world. But yet, I'm not. I have an empty uterus and a broken heart. I know that the next week or so, I will be very much a shell of a person...functioning on autopilot, getting away with bare minimums.

I feel like my heart is broken. I feel like I need to take a vacation...and get away from it all.

It kills me going into work every day seeing the kids and knowing that I SHOULD be getting ready to have a baby, be HUGE, and going on maternity leave soon. But I'm not.

I feel so broken. I feel like I don't know what to say or do to make it better. I'm taking herbal supplements to help with my mood, and it really does help....its just hard to function when I know I am not welcoming a baby.

My cycle is due to start Dec 11th...the day after my due date....I don't know what kind of irony that is, but I don't like it ONE bit.

This month's posts probably wont be pretty...but I need to get through this..the only way I know how

I want to be pregnant again...with a fierceness that consumes my very soul.